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When I spoke to another Congolese person they understood me, but when I spoke to someone who didn’t speak my mother tongue, conversations couldn’t be as natural as I wanted them to be.A Ghanaian friend of mine told me “My (Jamaican) boyfriend really tried to speak my language because he realised that it was important to me.” Ethnic capital of the world For me, a twenty-something year old Congolese woman who grew up in the city of London – a city I like to call “the ethnic capital of Europe” – dating someone from a different culture was not a problem.That's not her real name as she doesn't wish to reveal her true identity.A few years ago her family started pressuring her into finding a husband. Infected despite precautions Gloria doesn't know how she became infected.Am I saying that those who date outside of their culture are not in tune with their own?Certainly not, but they certainly have embraced other cultures more and are willing to look past any real, imagined or expected obstacles.Gloria's mother eventually gave her Michael's phone number and persuaded her to call him. He gave me counseling, we prayed and he really encouraged me to battle on in my life." When Gloria discovered that she was HIV positive, she fell into a bottomless pit of despair. It was through him that she met her future husband, she calls him John. She was terrified that her child, a son, would be born HIV positive. But when he was six months old, the doctors were able to confirm that he had been born HIV negative.Michael says he has 7,000 people on his books seeking a partner.
Stop wasting your time; you’ll regret it when you get older. It’s for your own good”, said her mother, adamantly.If you can communicate with someone in a language that you both feel comfortable with, it makes being with that person easier.